Men Become Temporarily Blind During Sex

For one man, love was literally making him blind. Well, at least having sex was. The unnamed patient had to seek medical help after going temporarily blind every time he climaxed during sex, the Daily Mail reported.

The NCBI ROFL blog, which is written by two PhD students at UC Berkeley, uncovered the story from the PubMed database.

Do Men Like Big Women's Breasts?

It's a fact: people in America, and not just men, idolize big breasts. Every year, American women spend millions of dollars on breast implants, cosmetic procedures to improve their breasts, breast enlargement pills, pumps and creams.

Considering the role that big breasts play in our culture and society, the amount time, energy, money and emotion that goes into breast enlargement seems justified.
But why do men like big breasts?

Menopause & Sexual Problems

Menopause occurs when a woman stops ovulating and her monthly period (menstruation) ceases. It is a natural event that marks the end of the reproductive years.

The production of sex hormones, in particular oestrogen, falls significantly around menopause. Testosterone levels in women slowly decline from about 30 years of age. A woman in her forties has, on average, half the testosterone circulating in her bloodstream as a woman in her twenties. The reduction of these hormones may directly affect libido or sex drive and sexual function for some women. It may also cause physical and psychological changes that will affect sexual function.

The Frequent Sex Benefits

Active sex life is one of the major factors for maintaining a healthy body, soul and relationship. Read about 10 perfect health excuses why it is so good to have sex often.

Why is it good to have frequent sex?
When you think of sex, such questions probably do not fill your head because you love having sex and you truly do not need to seek the reasons for it. However, a plus or two cause no harm.

Why Men Think About Infidelity

In a perfect world, there would be no infidelity. Boy meets girl, boy marries girl, they have babies and live happily ever after. However, we do not live in a perfect world. We never have, and we never will. So where does infidelity fit into all this? Untidily, that's how. Infidelity does not just happen, it's the symptom of a bad relationship, in many cases, rather than the cause.

Women are More Attracted to Men Who Drive Expensive

Research conducted by FindsYouCars.com has revealed that when it comes to buying a new motor, men are prepared to splurge a massive £5k more than women.

With psychologists proving that women are more attracted to men who drive expensive, flashy cars, it’s no surprise that they are splashing out a third more than the ladies on their ultimate passion wagon.

On average, men will spend approximately £14k on their next car in comparison to women, who appear to be the thriftier sex, paying a more modest £9k.

Men have also been proven to be the fussier sex when it comes to buying their next motor, with 67% resolute and pernickety about what they’re looking for. This makes men twice as picky as women in the car department, with men from London being the worst offenders, followed by those in the Midlands.

In comparison, it appears women consider their next car as a more functional item rather than an extension of their personality. Just a third are fussy about the specifics of their next motor, with ladies in the North East being the least picky of all.

It is assumed that while men are looking for larger engines and impressive brands, women are more concerned with comfort, space and colors. The online car ‘find engine’ for consumers, analysed 500 car buyer requests from September and found that BMW topped the charts as the most desired car brand for men with Volkswagen winning the women’s vote.

Whatever people are looking for in their next car, will help find the car, quickly and securely, without them having to do the legwork themselves. Buyers simply specify the car they are looking for on the free site, along with any specific requirements (make, model, age, mileage, price) and the find engine then matches their request with its established network of over 5,000 registered UK suppliers who have a suitable car.

This saves people conducting lengthy online searches, sifting through thousands of irrelevant search results and ensures results are 100% tailored and personal.

Add More Spice to Your Love Relationship

Maintaining a relationship is as much the man’s responsibility as it is the woman’s. It’s a two way street, as they say. Some men seek excitement outside of their relationship without even bothering to shake things up within the relationship. If you find yourself wondering about a “gorgeous hottie at work” for too long, it’s time for a reality check – focus on the woman who is already in your life and bring back the spark by following these helpful tips.

• Understand her point of view

Often men complain about their partner not making the first move, neglecting the way they look and focusing more on work or children. The first thing that men need to understand is that women need to do all these things to keep your life running smoothly. After a hard day of work or of meeting the incessant demands of your kids, it is impossible for your wife to look like a “gorgeous hottie” all the time. If you are seeking more excitement in your relationship, there are many things you can do yourself before you start pointing fingers at the woman in your life. Ask yourself what you can do for her, not what she can do for you.

• Sense of humor – The biggest ‘X’ factor

Many women complain about their men returning too irritated or stressed after work. If you find yourself losing your temper too often – it’s time to de-stress. Don’t bring your work tension home, it may be easier said than done, but if you make a conscious effort, with time you can learn to leave day to day work stress at the office. There’s a good chance that your partner was attracted to you in first place because of your sense of humor - if you lose that, you lose your charm. Keep the spark alive with your sense of humor and keep your partner attracted to you. This will ensure a fun atmosphere and sparks in the bedroom are sure to follow.

• Compliments will get you everywhere

There’s nothing like a genuine compliment to make a woman feel good, expensive diamonds and fancy restaurants aren’t necessary. Tell her that she looks gorgeous when she wears that blue dress or when she leaves her hair down, and she will make an effort to get you to notice her good features again. But keep in mind that the compliments have to be genuine and not delivered in an offhand manner. Overtly sexy compliments are good at times as every woman wants her man to want her. A confident woman will feel sexy and good about herself and the positive effect will be seen in your bedroom too.

• Share her workload and worries

If there’s a roast in the oven, clothes waiting to be ironed and kids screaming in the background, it would be unreasonable to expect her to feel sexy. While she is in the kitchen, why not help with the laundry and keep the kids under control, instead of watching ESPN – by the time she finishes her work, you both will have more spare time to do fun things in the bedroom. Stress often hampers a woman’s libido; if you can share her workload and worries, you can easily make her feel more relaxed and sexy.

• Focus on her pleasure

Many men whine about their partner not being active enough in bed, not giving them oral pleasure or not doing wild things to spice up their sex life. If she isn’t initiating more adventurous sex, why don’t you set a good example and get the ball rolling yourself. If she still doesn’t get the hint, talk to her openly. She might resist the idea at first, but with the right approach she will see your point. Also, ask her what she would like you to do while you are at it and then do it like a true gentleman.

These tips are not new, but that does not make them any less true or important. Some of these tips run the risk of being considered clichéd, but it’s likely that any man could be guilty of at least one of these mistakes. If you find yourself saying “Oh yes, I am guilty of that one!” even once, you are well on your way to mending your relationship.

Psychic Love Power

How can you know if psychic love power actually exists? Doesn't your guy always tell you exactly what he's thinking? Is there any way to read his mind and find out if he is communicating his true feelings with you? Actually, you don't need psychic love power to figure that out; simply look for these three signs and his real emotions will be uncovered for you.

There are microscopes that appear from his actions which will allow you to see inside your guy's heart. It doesn't matter if he is trying to keep them hidden; neither if he is trying to deceive you. Actions don't lie - and these are no exception to that rule.

His smile

No guy can fake a genuine smile and get away with it for very long. Just look at his countenance after his favorite team wins a game. Remember it, and see if it matches how he looks when you meet him for a date after not seeing him for a few days. He might not leap for joy and start screaming, but his smile should look similar to the one he had on game day.

If there is no match, you might be the recipient of his fake smile. There might be trouble brewing beneath the surface. Here, psychic love power here is not necessary. He has probably grown complacent with your relationship.

He includes you in his life

Has your relationship been secluded away from his personal and professional life? If you guy isn't introducing you to his work colleagues and family, there must be a reason. A guy who is truly in love will want to show you off to the world and let them know that you're his. Your man will also talk about you positively to others and be your biggest fan.

He puts your needs above his own

If you can honestly say that you've seen your guy go without something so you can get something you want, then you will know he is in love. For example, does he refrain from purchasing new clothes so you will have more money for a new outfit?

It could even be as small as letting you snack on the last Oreo. If you have experienced this type of sacrifice, you have found a man that would be great husband material. Otherwise, you could be in for a lifetime of selfishness to deal with.

Look for these signs, and others, to figure out what he is really feeling and you won't have to rely on psychic love power...deep down you will already know the truth about him.

Clothes Make Sex Hotter

Think the only purpose clothes serve in a sack session is as an obstacle? Don't be too quick to strip — there are naughty things you can do with your threads that'll heat up a hookup.

"Staying partially clad builds anticipation and makes sex feel spontaneous," says Georgia clinical sexologist Gloria G. Brame, PhD. "Plus, you can use clothing and accessories as props to enhance tactile sensations." Try these inventive and tantalizing tips.

Stand behind him, wrap your arms around his torso, and press against him. Then slide your hands into his boxers while kissing the back of his neck.
Give him a long look at you in a bra, panties, and tall boots. The vixenish-sweet combo majorly turns men on.

Blindfold him with his tie. Blocking his sight heightens his other senses, and not knowing your next move will drive him insane (in a good way).

While wearing a silky camisole, climb on top of him and slide your body all over his naked skin.

Let him lick your breasts through a sheer bra, then pull down the straps one at a time to grant him full access.

Whip off his belt, fold it in half, and playfully smack his butt.

Gently bind his ankles together using your bra. When you restrict his movement, you get to be in control and he feels the thrill of being dominated.
Unzip his pants, but don't pull them off. Instead, take his member out of the opening in his boxers and treat him to oral sex. It'll give him a rush to have only this one sexy body part exposed.

Have him place his hands or mouth down south while you're in undies. The fabric is a barrier (amping excitement), and his warm breath will feel amazing.

Roll a smooth beaded necklace over his stomach or up and down his thighs and along his member to give him a soft, skin-tingling massage.

Slip off your panties but keep your skirt on for girl-on-top sex.
Fling open a front-closure bra right before climax. Setting your breasts free will send him tumbling over the edge.

Sit on top of him while he's in his boxers or pants and you have on underwear or thin shorts. Grind back and forth against him for as long as you can, then ditch your undies and have sex.

Don't let him remove his T-shirt during sex. Mid-orgasm, grab the fabric in the middle of his chest, twist it so it tightens around his torso and pull him close.
Just push your underwear aside to have sex. The immediacy of it is hot — like you can't wait to have each other.

Sexual Attraction

Physical attraction may be as old as time, but new studies are beginning to uncover the science behind sex appeal. Unexpected factors -- like biochemical odors, face shape and voice pitch -- just might have more to do with your choice of mate than anyone ever expected.

Karl Grammer and Elizabeth Oberzaucher are leading the research on the human scent's influence on sexual attraction. They've found that when women are ovulating, they produce copulins, a scent that attracts men.

The researchers believe when a man gets a whiff of copulins, his testosterone levels rise. As a result, he secretes androstenone, an odor that repels women who aren't ovulating.

"Bars and nightclubs across the world are the battlefield for this invisible biochemical war," Oprah Winfrey says.

Sex therapist Dr. Laura Berman says attraction has a lot more to do with science and evolution than people might think.

"We are innately all puppies in heat," she says. "We are capable of discerning 10,000 different scents consciously. But then there's a whole realm of unconscious scents that we're not even aware that we're smelling." Oprah.com: Get Dr. Berman's 5 steps to better sex.

These odors let people know when a woman is fertile and when a man's testosterone levels are high, Berman says. As a result, individuals can tell when someone else is most ripe for reproduction. "It's all about survival of the species," she says.

One common complaint Berman hears among women with relationship problems is that they love their partner, but they're not in love with him.

"There is a difference between love and chemistry," Berman says. "Take a really good whiff of him without cologne when he's relatively clean. If that smell turns you on, that's a really good cue of chemistry." Oprah.com: Can the chemistry come later?

In one recent study, Berman says, researchers had women smell men's T-shirts. The women were most attracted to the shirts of men with a different major histocompatability complex (MHC) from them. MHC is a collection of genes that are related to immune systems.

"We unconsciously want to mate with someone who has a different immune system than ours because that helps with the survival of our offspring," Berman says.

The T-shirt study also found that women taking hormonal contraception were attracted to men who had similar MHC as they did.

"If you're on the pill, your body is being tricked into think you're pregnant, so you're not ovulating," Berman says. "The bad news there is that they have looked at these couples who have similar MHC, and not only do they have higher levels of infidelity and higher levels of marital discord, but they also have higher infertility issues."

Another unexpected factor that has been found to directly affect attraction is voice pitch.

Gordon Gallup, Ph.D., a professor at the State University of New York at Albany, says that women with higher estrogen levels have higher voices, which makes them more desirable to men. "When females are midcycle, when they're the most fertile, the most likely to conceive, their voices are rated as being significantly more attractive," he says.

It's hard to pinpoint what distinguishes a gorgeous face from an average one, but some researchers are getting pretty close. Psychologist Lisa DeBruine, Ph.D., of the University of Aberdeen in Scotland says she's found that women's faces get more attractive to men when they are ovulating. "We're not entirely clear why there's this difference, but we think that the women might look healthier, have a bit of a healthier glow when they are ovulating."

Symmetry is another factor that determines a face's attractiveness. Kendra Schmid, an assistant professor of biostatistics at the University of Nebraska Medical Center, says there is a formula for the "perfect" face. She uses 29 different measurements to determine someone's appeal on a scale of 1 to 10.

To start, Schmid says the ratio of the length of the face to the width of the face should be 1.6, also known as the golden ratio."The face should also be divided into three equal pieces vertically," she says. "The forehead, then [the bottom of the forehead to] the nose and then from the nose to the chin."

Who's face is the most "perfect," according to Schmid's measurements? No big surprise here! "Brad Pitt's is the highest that I've ever used the [formula] on," she says. "He was a 9.3."

Brad's partner, Angelina Jolie, didn't fare too badly either. "Angelina was a 7.67, and that's pretty high," Schmid says. "Most people rate about 4 to 6. ... The thing that is probably lowering her score is the thing that she's most famous for -- her full lips." Schmid says that ideally the width of a mouth should be twice the height of the lips.

Other celebrities Schmid tested were Halle Berry, who scored a 7.36, and Hugh Jackman, a 6.45. "There's never been anyone who was a perfect 10," Schmid says. "If you're out there, we're looking for you!"

Not everything that goes into finding a partner is biological. Researchers have also found that if a woman looks at the face of a man whom she knows nothing about, she will give it a rating on a scale of 1 to 10 that's different than if she is shown the same face and a corresponding income. When a man makes a lot of money, a woman will rate him higher on an attractiveness scale than she would that same man with a smaller income. Oprah.com: What do women really want?

Berman says this isn't a case of women being gold diggers.

"It goes back again to evolution. When we were having babies who were very dependent on us, we couldn't hunt and take care of ourselves, so we were looking for the man who had the most social status, who was the best hunter, who was going to bring home the biggest chunk of meat for our babies," she says. "It's the same thing today."

Smell, voice pitch and face symmetry might be unconscious detectors of attractiveness, but if you're trying to consciously assess the future of a relationship, Berman says there's one surefire way.

"You really learn a lot from a kiss. ... Sixty-six percent of women say they would dump a guy after a bad first kiss," she says. "It's not only because you're getting that good whiff of him so you're seeing if you like the way he smells. All your senses are engaged, and you get a sense of his sensuality, his connection, whether he's a take-charge kind of guy or more of a stepping back kind."

When it comes to relationships, Berman says kissing frequency is a direct indicator of happiness. "It turns out that couples who kiss and cuddle regularly are eight times less likely to be stressed and depressed than couples who don't get that," she says. "You have to have a minimum of a 10-second kiss every day."

5 Secrets to Attract a Person

Want to quintuple your odds of winning in the dating game?
We surveyed a variety of top experts and learned five unbelievably effective secrets to make the opposite sex come running.

Here's how you can use them to work for you:

1. BE THE CENTER OF ATTENTION

Want to be the one who gets noticed? Stand in the center of the room. According to Dr. Albert Mehrabian, the author of several books and nationally-known expert in the field of spacial psychology, where you are in a room has a lot to do with your ability to attract the opposite sex.

Where should you be for the highest impact and the greatest number of interested cuties? Smack-dab in the center of the room, standing up and moving around a bit. (But don't pace a track on the carpet for goodness sake...) If you're in a bar or nightclub, the best place to be is at one of the corners on the bar. Not only will you meet more people, but, according to Mehrabian, bartenters tend to gravitate toward the corners as well.

Interesting conversation AND a full drink? You'll feel like you've died and gone to dating heaven. The worst place to be seen? Hanging out near the wall or sitting at a table. That hot stranger approaching your table and asking "may I join you" only happens in the movies.

2. THE COLOR LURE

What color can you wear to compel the opposite sex to approach you?

According to Color Consultant Leatrice Eiseman, Director of the Pantone Color Institute and author of Colors For Your Every Mood, women are attracted to men wearing the color blue. And why wouldn't we be? According to Eiseman, guys who frequently wear blue are "stable, faithful, constant and always there." The blue guy is a fantastic candidate for a long-term relationship -- someone who's dependable, momogomous and can match his own clothes. And what about the ladies? Eiseman says women should wear a pink- peach to make themselves most approachable. The color is "very flattering to most skin tones, it gives you healthy glow," and according to Eiseman, projects "a little vulnerability which brings out something protective in men."

Want to wear a color that weeds out guys who can't handle strong women? Try a deep red, burgundy or plum. Men who aren't attracted to strong women will steer clear.

Of all the colors, red is the most sensual. But, wear red with caution. "Red is the color of sex and power," says Eiseman. Red adds an element of excitement and attracts two types of men - men interested in sex, and men attracted to powerful women. Sure, you'll probably have to fend off a lot of freaks, but you could also end up attracting a guy that isn't threatened by the fact that you make a bigger salary.

Concerned your wardrobe is driving people away? Stay away from what Eiseman calls "squished caterpillar yellow-green" which is said to repel both sexes equally.

3. BODY TALK THAT REELS 'EM IN

How do you use body language to attract the opposite sex?

If you're a woman, the key is to make yourself approachable. According to nationally-respected body language expert and professional speaker, Patti Wood, you want to make yourself a "safe" target. How do you accomplish that? Don't take up a lot of space which is a sign of power and superiority. Wood says, "we are strong women, but remember, we're trying to get a man to come over and talk to us." She explains, "you have to show you have room for someone else in your life."

In addition, Wood says "to be very approachable women should stand with their feet no farther than 6 inches apart with toes pointed slightly inward. " Other key moves, the nod and the head tilt - signal you're listening to what the other person has to say.

For men, appearing more dominant effectively draws the attraction of women. To attract women, stand with your feet 6-10 inches apart, and toes pointing outward. Feel free to take up some space. For men who are victims of the "nice guy" badge, or who appear to be too submissive to attract women, try taking your Y chromosome out for a spin. According to Mehrabian, men should "try wearing bulkier or more conservative hairstyles or clothing," hold your head up, and speed up your speech and gestures to be more assertive.

Body language tips for both sexes: Don't fold your arms and don't chew on gum, ice or your fingernails. According to Wood, the chewing indicates anxiety or frustration, neither of which are very attractive emotions.

4. THE POWER OF A SMILE

Psychology and body language experts agree that one of the most important things you can do to make yourself more attractive and approachable is to smile. Not a great big plastic game-show smile, just your normal "I'm having a great time and I'm happy to be here" face will do the trick. According to Wood, "the smile is the international signal of friendliness."

5. TEMPTING WITH SCENT

Studies show that men associate the scents of cinnamon and vanilla with love. To make the scents work for you, try baking some ready-made cinnamon rolls about an hour before your date arrives, or, wear a cinnamon-vanilla scented perfume. Aromatherapy experts have long-believed cinnamon to be an aphrodisiac.

According to Laura Davimes, aromatherapy and herb expert , and owner of Herban Avenues, "certain aromatic plants exude oils similar to our own sexual secretions or pheromones. Wearing cinnamon/vanilla blends increases the presence of pheromone-like substances and dramatically increases attraction."

The scent of a woman? Women, according to a recent study, are attracted to a black licorice scent. So, be sure to pick up licorice or Good 'n Plenty at the theater snack bar. And, if you're at a club and happen to spill a little Jaggermeister on your shirt, don't worry about the stain, just consider it your lucky night.

Sex as Exercises

It not only helps burning extra calories, but also allows couples to perform routine exercises and also enjoy sexual pleasure. What else can couples ask for!

Dr. Basheer Ahmad Roy, a Bangalore-based sex specialist states, “Almost all muscles including the legs, thighs, arms, shoulders and lower abdomen are worked upon during a sexual interaction. Anything that is done for the body should be done for at least 15 minutes and a sex session may not stretch for this long. So couples need to pay extra attention that if they wish to derive additional health benefits from sexual positions, they need to prolong sexual activity right from foreplay to the climax state.”

Apart from the fact that sex brings relief from headaches, reduces depression and tranquilises the mind, leads to glowing hair and skin etc, it’s also true that many sexual positions double up as easy workouts.

Dr. Shivi Jaggi, a Delhi-based sexologist asserts, “Sex helps burning a lot of calories. Different positions in which partners participate as per their comfort level lead to a fit body. A few complex positions that require more of physical strength and involve more work lead to weight-loss and exercising of muscles. Intensity of movements and duration of sex make a lot of difference.

Here are some lovemaking positions, which will let you stretch the most important muscle groups in your body...

Missionary position (Man on top)
In the Indian context, more than 90 per cent of couples indulge in the missionary position in bed, which seems to be quite gratifying for them. As the act involves weight balancing, it obviously has a number of physical benefits. The missionary position is all about stretching, arching and tightening. While the male partner is on top, the female laying on her back can also stretch her back, arch and tighten the abs. In addition, she can also try tightening the kegel muscles right during the act.

Dr. Jaggi elucidates, “The partner on top gets more involved in the physical activity. With a male partner on top, a lot of pressure is borne by his arms and shoulders. Besides, elbows and knees are used to the maximum while balancing in such a position; hence it stretches the muscles in both these body parts. In addition, thigh muscles are also worked upon during the missionary position, as you are almost on your knees during the act.”

Woman on top
It is said that women can orgasm quickly while on top. Yet there is an evident reluctance among Indian women to try this position in bed. But having a female partner taking the lead is a very good exercise. It allows both partners to enjoy an equal participation, where the woman uses her hands and arms to prop up and down, and the male partner is holding the woman thus balancing her body weight.

Dr. Jaggi shares, “With the woman on the top, the weight would normally be borne by the male partner. Women being the physically weaker counterpart during sex, you cannot expect them to hold on to their body mass completely. So again it’s more of exercise for the men, where they use their biceps’ muscles to hold their female partner. For a female too, just to maintain the position for a longer duration, she is stretching her biceps, triceps, forearms and chest muscles to the fullest.”

Sexing Up Domestic Violence

Does violence at home have a throbbing beat for a backdrop and erotic sex burning up the house? Eminem might think he's presenting a case against domestic violence, but with lines like these:

"Just gonna stand there and watch me burn, But that's alright because I like the way it hurts"

pouring from co-star Rihanna's beautiful lips as her liquid kohl-rimmed eyes show us how caught in erotic fascination she is, we see one long rationalization about how two people caught up in alcohol and sex flame out to a passion-soaked burn.

That's the song your kids will be humming and dancing to while they watch a glamour-drama of domestic abuse amidst love gone wrong.

After watching Eminem's "Love The Way You Lie"video, I wonder if it's meant to warn women away from bad boys, or if the message tells us to be more understanding girlfriends, and thus rescue our tortured battering boyfriends. Certainly Eminem shows himself as an alarmingly appealing, if dangerous, man -- one that can easily catch the heart of a young woman looking for someone to rescue.

Eminem's portrayal is tediously close to how my former clients (batterers) viewed themselves. After years of hearing men deny, justify, and whine their way towards explaining away violence, I can't find a shred of sexy in Eminem's portrayal, despite his obvious desperation -- either as the character or as himself -- to explain away what he admits is wrong, but excuses with lines such as "And right before I'm about to drown, she resuscitates me."

Too many young men and women will find this all spectacularly sexy. The women are beautiful, even while being choked. The men are tortured by their rage, longing for love and peace. Oh, that the women would behave, their men would retreat to serenity.

How about a real-life PSA about violence against women from stars. Who'll play the role of the man whacking out his wife's teeth while the kids watch? Who want to play that role? Perhaps it's time we see what we're teaching our children as portrayed so well by Holly Levin.

Domestic violence isn't just about couples fighting over romance. It's part of a continuum. The United Nations explains, "Globally, up to six out of every ten women experience physical and/or sexual violence in their lifetime. A World Health Organization study of 24,000 women in 10 countries found that the prevalence of physical and/or sexual violence by a partner varied from 15 percent in urban Japan to 71 percent in rural Ethiopia, with most areas being in the 30-60 percent range."

Would Eminem make star-studded videos about a woman beating her children? A woman being burned by the Taliban? A gang rape on the street? A desperate junkie killing a man for a fix? Like the man portrayed in Eminem's video, there is no doubt the mother, the Taliban and the junkie are all under the influence of either substances or twisted beliefs -- but no one is putting a dance tune to their violence.

I suppose it's only when it's inside a relationship and behind closed doors that violence is given an erotic edge by a celebrity.

Maybe if we take the sexy out of smashing each other up, our children won't have to witness it. The legacy of domestic violence is a rotten inheritance to leave them, no matter how much glamour we put in the drama.

Do Women Seek a Romantic Partner

What, exactly, do women seeking a romantic partner want?

Without clarity on this defining question, the prospective suitor is like a dog chasing a car. Even if he catches it, he’s entirely unclear on what to do next.

Ask eligible women about being pursued by romantically intentioned men.

It isn’t pretty.

Three beguiling Toronto enchantresses say their confounding singleness is an unavoidable reaction to the pool of Toronto courters who are too wishy-washy, self-obsessed, commitment phobic, lacking in basic propriety and brutish in their online dating rituals.

“Toronto guys are shoppers,” says Megan Matthews, a charming 29-year-old public relations professional who is invited on half a dozen dates a month by men who typically disappoint.

“They’re always looking out for the next best thing. It’s a hunter-gatherer thing.”

To wit: A recent date with a shameless chap who made Matthews the opening of a double-header date night.

“We’re having a drink in a bar and he suddenly says, ‘I’ve got to go. Put your money down.’ He crossed the street and I watched him sit down in another place with a woman.”

Let’s say you wished to lure the interests of Lauren Cochran, a 29-year-old human resources manager with wit, a successful career and a discerning gaze.

Her first method of sorting wheat from chaff is likely beyond any practical preparation: physical chemistry.

“Clearly, my method of going after hot stuff isn’t working,” she says. “I put too much emphasis on the initial attraction. Something has to be exciting about the first meeting.”

If your mojo gets you a second glance, you must now execute a counterintuitive move with a high degree of difficulty: Ease off on the sexual chemistry that got you here.

“Men are hyper-sexual. They’re looking for it right away. It’s too much too soon.”

Down, boy.

Dodge this bullet and there are still minefields to negotiate, from the obvious to the never-saw-it-coming variety.

“If he’s rude to service people or treats women like meat, that’s a problem.”

George Clooney or George Costanza, there appears to be one constant in the view of the contemporary single woman: Men behave badly.

A common beef: Guys who prioritize their BlackBerry messages ahead of the woman sitting across from them. We are man-boys with the attentions spans of gnats, they say.

“Is sending messages every five seconds at the table really necessary?” Matthews queries. “Take it off the table.”

Cochran, who includes online dating in her regimen, has experienced some gonzo first approaches.

One recent message for a first-time online suitor reads as follows:

“Not to sound like a perv or anything but your long torso, strong hips, it says you’re more into deep sensual rather than speed or intensity.”

Darcie Vany, a 31-year-old accountant and relationship blogger has been shocked by the photos men use to attract a mate online.

Take, for example, the burgeoning ranks of men hoping to allure the love of their life with photos of themselves without a shirt.

“I don’t care how hot the body is, this is just not acceptable.”

Another frequently unchecked item on Vany’s wish list: Style.

“I can’t see myself ever dating a guy who wears golf shirts.”

Matthews is willing to provide some charitable sympathy to dating-challenged men, suggesting women need to share some blame for the misconnections.

“We’ve demanded to be independent and men don’t really know what to do. We’ve confused them.”

This singular point may be the foundation from which to acknowledge a misalignment of expectations that play such dirty tricks on us.

“Women need to feel safe, loved and cherished. Men need to feel respected, appreciated and acknowledged,” says relationship expert Catherine Cardinal. “The biggest problem in relationships is women not understanding how men work and men not understanding the inner workings of the female mind.”

What’s Wrong with Male Sexuality

Men’s sex lives are full of lies. It’s true that we live in a patriarchy, and it may be true that it’s a man’s world, but when it comes to sex, men lose out big time. This might seem a surprising statement. After all the entire multi-billion dollar sex industry is designed around male sexual fantasies. Popular surveys of sexual behaviors suggest that men get a lot more than they give in the bedroom, and men usually have equal or greater sexual satisfaction ratings when asked in scientific surveys. So what could be so bad about male sexuality?

In a nutshell, male sexuality is almost entirely an unexamined phenomenon, and it is based on many assumptions which have been accepted as fact by both the scientific community and the general public. And the problem is that if men don’t start asking themselves the hard questions about their own sex lives, it’s never going to improve. Consider some of the major myths about male sexuality:

Male sexuality is the norm

Male sexuality is the yards stick by which sex in general is defined. The problem is that everyone assumes they know what a yard stick is, and no one bothers to look at it carefully. We need to notice the lines on it, how its weathered in some places, and untouched in others. We need to measure it not by relying on its own superficial markings of inches and feet, but by taking other measuring tools and looking at it out of context.

Because male sexuality is the norm, it’s never questioned. This is a problem because male sexuality is as complicated as female sexuality and needs to be questioned.

Male sexuality is tolerated

In the West, male sexuality is tolerated to a much greater degree than female sexuality. From an early age we hear the familiar refrain “boys will be boys” which allows young men to explore their sexuality in silence and semi-secret. Because of this covert collusion, there are fewer obvious barriers for male sexuality to develop.

This is a problem because obstacles are what make us move and stretch ourselves out. And because we still live in a relatively sex negative culture, having no barriers doesn’t mean uninhibited growth, it means taking the path of least resistance. The result is men never even get a chance to conceive of their sexual options, they take what they get and assume it’s the best there is.

Male sexuality is obvious, visible, “out there”

This is another way of saying that male sexuality is all about the penis. This is possibly the most persistent and inaccurate statement about male sexuality, and one that does the greatest damage. That’s right, the penis may be male sexuality’s greatest nemesis! Men’s genitalia is external and most men learn to masturbate, ejaculate, and orgasm at a young age without any help or instruction, making male sexual response something that comes easy (no pun intended).

Because male sexuality seems to flow freely, it is assumed that there’s nothing remarkable about it, and nothing more to know about it. Freud most famously suggested that male sexuality was simple but female sexuality was something beyond even his comprehension. In this case Freud got it wrong. Male sexuality is simple because we approach it as simpletons.

Male sexuality is straight.

This is another classic assumption about male sexuality, and one that is “proven” by the fact that we all follow the rules. Ignoring an important Greek philosopher here and there, it is generally accepted modern notion that while women may have some “natural” bisexual leaning, men are mostly straight.

There are of course gay men, but they’re “different” and either 2% or 10% of the population, depending on which radio station you listen to. So when we talk as a culture about male sexuality, we’re almost always talking about what we think of as heterosexual male sexuality, which is a narrow concept involving penile-vaginal intercourse preceded by minimal foreplay and oral sex.

This is a problem because it’s not true. In reality, men want to do all sorts of things sexually and they often do them not just with women. Whether it is the early data of Alfred Kinsey who asked men about their same sex experiences growing up, or the wide range of programs geared to men who have sex with men (MSM) a group at high risk for HIV/AIDS, who do not identify as gay, but still enjoy sex with men, male sexual behaviors are far more varied and kinky than we generally acknowledge, which in turn limits what many men feel is okay to explore.

Romantic in Movie May Affect Real Love-Lives

According to a recent poll conducted in Australia, is appears that watching romantic comedies, or “rom-coms”, can have an affect on real-life relationships. It would seem that the glam and glitter of on-screen romance has led to a kind of disillusionment with its off-screen counterpart.

“It seems our love of rom-coms is turning us into a nation of ‘happy-ever-after addicts’,” said Australian relationship counselor Gabrielle Morrissey. “Yet the warm and fuzzy feeling they provide can adversely influence our view of real relationships.” Morrissey added that unlike movie romances, “real relationships take work and true love requires more than fireworks.”

The poll, which was released by Warner Home Video in conjunction with the release of the movie “Valentine’s Day” to home video, showed that half of the 1000 people surveyed said that the glittery happy ending of the rom-com has ruined their perception of what an ideal relationship is.

The movie “”Valentine’s Day” is about a collection of couples who get together, break up, or make relationship changes surrounding the February 14th holiday. It stars Jessica Alba, Jessica Biel, Jamie Fox, and Ashton Kutcher and is likely to contain just the kind of gilded happy ending that makes people disappointed in their real lives.

The Benefits of Sex for Your Skin

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, right? Wrong, says Dr. Gloria G. Bramer, a Georgia-based licensed clinical sexologist. According to her, an orgasm a day keeps the doctor away (we're sure apples are fine too, but we prefer this prevention method)! "An orgasm is one of the healthiest things you can give yourself each day. From a sexologist's point of view it should be included in your routine along with brushing your teeth and washing your hair."

Sex makes you glow.

It's true – sex gives your skin a heavenly glow. Bramer says that having sex improves blood circulation, which helps to pump oxygen to your skin and make it brighter. It also helps to eliminate toxins and can actually make your lips a little fuller.

It controls acne.

Just as with people who exercise, Bramer says, having sex reduces your hormone levels and balances them out. The result? Clearer-looking skin, along with healthier hair!

It controls acne.

Just as with people who exercise, Bramer says, having sex reduces your hormone levels and balances them out. The result? Clearer-looking skin, along with healthier hair!

It prevents dry skin.

Bramer says that many people tie sexiness to an age. "Women become less sexual as they get older and hit menopause because they have less hormones going through them," she says. Once you hit menopause, your skin quality diminishes and suddenly you may notice your face is extremely dry. By having sex and getting the blood and oxygen flowing, you can keep dry skin away regardless of your age.

It prevents wrinkles too!

Remember we said having sex boosts collagen production? That means it helps to keep you wrinkle-free in the process! Especially for those stressed-filled workweeks, we can't think of any facial mask that works as well as sex does for your skin.

Sex makes your nails stronger.

The same hormones that are released to make your skin glow will also keep your nails strong, especially during pregnancy, says Fulbright.

Sex makes your nails stronger.

The same hormones that are released to make your skin glow will also keep your nails strong, especially during pregnancy, says Fulbright.

It cleanses your pores.

No need for pore cleansers: Sex will do the trick, depending on how hot and heavy things are getting. By sweating during sex, you're actually giving your face a free facial. The sweat will clean from your pores the dirt, grime, and makeup residue you miss when you cleanse your face during the day.

Can Your Sex Drive Influence Your Immune System?

We, as human beings, are complex. Most people are aware that exercise is good for us. Exercise is good for the immune system. Just like exercise, sexual activity can also be very good for the immune system. Good sex puts us in a good mood; even not so good sex can have positive influences on our overall health. You will have to define for yourself what good sex is. For some, good sex is sexual activity that always leads to an orgasm. For other people, having an orgasm isn't always the primary objective.

Do your thoughts about your sex life influence your immune system?

Have you ever heard the saying, "you are what you think you are"? All of us have beliefs about ourselves, and we tend to become what we believe we are. For instance, if you believe yourself to unsuccessful in life, you probably will be. If you believe you are not as good as other people, you will most likely have a poor self-image. The same goes for your beliefs about your sex life. If you believe that sex isn't good unless you achieve an orgasm, then if you don't have an orgasm, you may become frustrated. Being sexually frustrated, over time, can have a negative influence on your overall well being. The key to having a healthy sex life is to enjoy sexual activity whether you have an orgasm or not. When you are having a good time during sexual activity, your brain is being flooded with feel good chemicals. In turn, when you are turned on, your endocrine system is also turned on.

How does sex influence the immune system?

We are more than our composite parts. Our immune system can be influenced by many factors, such as our physical, mental and sexual health. We know that stress can influence our immune system. We also know that sex reduces stress in the body. Sexual activity influences our overall well being. When you have sex one or two times a week, you produce more IgA (immunoglobulin A), which is a specific type of antibody which helps you to fight disease causing bacteria and viruses. Thus, it stands to reason, if you have a healthy sex life, you are likely to have a healthy body and a healthy immune system.To have a healthy immune system, all your body systems should be in balance. Your body systems like to stay in a state of homeostasis.

For instance, when you are in a state of good health, your body temperature will be within normal limits, and your fluid and electrolyte balance will be where it should be. When one system gets out of balance, it can influence other body systems and your body can move out of the balanced state of homeostasis. When your body is no longer in homeostasis, your immune system can be negatively affected. Your sex life should be balanced also, to have a healthy immune system.

A scientific study, on the saliva of 112 college students, at Wilkes University in Pennsylvania showed that college students who had sex once or twice a week had higher levels of IgA than students who abstained from sex or had sex less than once a week. The study also showed that students who had sex three or more times a week had less IgA levels than the students who were having sexual activity once or twice a week. What does the test mean? From the results of the test, one can assume that people who have a balanced sex life may be healthier than people who have too little sex or too much sex. Is the study absolute? Does it mean that everyone who has sex less than once a week or more than four times a week are not as healthy as people who have sex at least once a week? Of course not! We must find our own balance. We are not all young college students.

For some of us, having sexual activity once or twice a month may be what we enjoy. Others may enjoy more sexual contact than others. The main objective is to enjoy sex and to feel good. If sex begins to make you feel tired in your everyday life, you might need to cut back to find your balance. You will know what your balance is when you feel good in your everyday life.

We are all individuals, and what we think and feel about our sex lives is specific to our own lives. If you are happy with your sex life, chances are your immune system will benefit from it. If you are not happy with your sex life, your immune system might not be as healthy as it could be. The bottom line is, your thoughts about your sex life influence your overall health.

The Links Between Sex and Stress

Sex and stress are linked in several ways. Most of us instinctively know this already, and feel it unmistakably when a particularly stressful week or two zaps us of our sex drive. But while stress can have a hand in low libido, it can also be a great stress reliever, which is why jokes about uptight bosses needing a good roll in the hay are always good for at least one knowing chuckle. Have you ever wondered how much truth there was to the idea that sex works nicely as a stress salve? Here’s some research on stress and sex:

Good Sex and Good MoodIn an Arizona State University study on 58 middle-aged women, physical affection or sexual behavior with a partner significantly predicted lower negative mood and stress, and higher positive mood the following day. Simply put, researchers found that sex and physical intimacy led women to feel less stressed and be in a better mood the next day.

Good Mood and Good SexThe same study found that being in a good mood predicted more physical affection and sexual activity with a partner the next day, showing that the sex-stress management connection works both ways: sex can lead you to feel less stressed, and being less stressed or at least in a better mood can lead to more sex. Further proof of the importance of effective stress management!

Sex and Blood PressureAnother study examined participants’ blood pressure as a measure of their stress responses during public speaking or challenging math problems—situations that often elicit stress.

It was found that those who had recently had intercourse tended to have either lower baseline blood pressures, less of a blood pressure rise during stressful events, or both. These findings suggest that having sex can lead to less of a stress response during challenging situations, which is a good thing.

Sex and Stress ResponseAlong those lines, another study looked at women’s heart rate and cortisol levels as a measure of stress response, and found that women exhibited less of a stress response after ‘positive physical contact’ with a partner. Emotional support alone didn’t have the same effect.
Orgasm and HealthOrgasm itself has many benefits for health and stress relief. Aside from these scientific findings, sex has some obvious stress management components. In addition to effectively taking your mind off of your worries for a decent period of time, sex provides some of these other stress management benefits:

Deep Breathing: This deep, relaxed type of breathing relaxes your body, oxygenates your blood and reduces the stress you feel.

Sense of Touch: Studies show that massage can be a great stress reliever. In fact, we need touch for our emotional health; studies also show that babies who are not touched enough can fail to thrive, and touch continues to be important into adulthood.

Social Support: People who have a supportive social outlet tend to manage stress better, live longer, and enjoy increased overall health. The type of emotional intimacy that sex can help supply is good for you!

Endorphins: Sexual activity releases endorphins and other feel-good hormones.

Physical Workout: Depending on your level of enthusiasm, you can burn a lot of calories during sex, and gain the stress management benefits of exercise as well.

Unfortunately, many people find that, when they’re under stress, their sex drive suffers.

Anna Chapman’s Ex Opens up about their Lively Sex Life

‘Russian spy’ Anna Chapman’s Brit ex-husband Alex Chapman has opened up, in detail, about their kinky sex life.

For the first time, Alex opened up about the kind of relationship he shared with Anna.

“I found her Russian accent such a turn-on,” News of the World quoted Alex as saying.

“The sex was great and she had this incredible body. It was more about lust at first. I hadn’t met anybody like her before,” he added.

The 30-year-old also revealed that the raunchy Russian liked posing fcoupleor pictures and loved trying out sex toys.

“I took one of her topless first thing in the morning,” he said.

“I said to Anna ‘go on get them out!’ and I took the picture of her with only a bit of the duvet over her. She laughed about it.

“We were having so much fun. We also experimented with sex toys.

“It was great fun although Anna was covering her face with a hat when I took the pictures,” he added.

Alex also said that Anna was never apprehensive about experimenting different places.

“When we were on the plane we came up with a plan to join the mile high club. I went to the toilet first and told her to follow later and knock,” he said.

“Anna was wearing a denim dress so I hitched it up and we just went for it. It was fantastic because of the thrill of doing it on a plane. We were in the toilet for about 15 minutes and then one of the cabin crew knocked on the door. I said Anna had been sick and I was helping her,” he added.

The couple married in Moscow in 2002 but their marriage didn’t last long and they separated in 2005.